Kathy Seiden's Blog
Useful news and information about divorce mediation and other topics
Presumptive Mediation in NY
Climate change has reached NY’s Court system. Chief Judge Janet DiFiore has handed down an initiative requiring all of the state’s courts to shift to a Presumptive Mediation model. The impetus for the change is an over-burdened court calendar and the recognition that...
One Size Fits One
In mediation, I help divorcing couples work through the details of their settlements. Most areas for decision making: parenting, property and support are generally the same for the vast majority of couples. After a session or two, however, the distinct needs of each family become clear and the discussions become tailored and personal. The family […]
The Parenting “Transparency”
Do you remember those overhead projectors? Actually, they are still in use. I checked Amazon. In my memory, the teacher would draw on a transparent sheet, lay it on the lighted glass and it would show up on the wall. As the lesson progressed, the teacher would add...
Red Flag or Gold Star?
Red Flag or Gold Star? Most couples that come to see me have chosen divorce mediation because they would like to arrive at a fair settlement with as little acrimony and expense as possible. These couples have a sense of practicality and confidence in their ability to...
Mediation, The Right Tools for the Job
In my experience, most couples that wish to work with a divorce mediator have a demeanor that’s open to arriving at a fair settlement. Sometimes, however, issues pop up that arouse great passion and the idea of what’s fair is challenged. Lately, I’ve mediated some...
7 Habits to a Successful Divorce Part 2
In Part 1 of this article, I enumerated how the first 4 habits in Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People are universal and how they can be applied in divorce mediation. Here are my thoughts about habits 5-7. 5. Seek first to understand then to be...
7 Habits to a Successful Divorce Part 1
Stephen Covey wrote the well-known and often cited 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. While the book is mainly directed at the habits of business people, the beneficial results of the enumerated habits are universal. So how can those concepts be applied to divorce...
Sunrise, Sunset…
Last month, to celebrate Valentines Day, I went to two programs on divorce. In the morning the topic was Gray Divorce sponsored by the Family and Divorce Mediation Council of greater NYC. In the afternoon, a book launch for a workbook about prenuptial agreements. These programs kept me out of my office but were well […]
Face to Face to Face
With so much on the line, why wouldn’t every divorcing couple choose mediation?
A Eunuch from Mars
Roger Fisher, Harvard Law professor and pioneer of negotiation and conflict resolution techniques famously referred to the best-qualified mediator as a Eunuch from Mars, someone who is not aligned with either party and is disinterested in the issues at hand....